Assalamualaikum
Dear reader(s)- if any,
My fingers aren't cooperating that much nowadays when i try (or rather push) myself to write anything anywhere - well exception goes to those work loads from lovely office that need my fingers' attention and not to forget, my brain - to function as well.
Well, i guess, life has changed so much in many forms. Everything that was used to be normal are no longer 'ordinary'. Example? Hmm... Do i need to give one when i'm in fact writing in Uncle Sam's language?
Honestly, i feel pity to those who subscribe to my dusty blog as Followers. I feel ashamed to answer those similiar questions at YM, email, chat or other means of communication - "Bile nk updet blog?". I feel bad whenever i saw a message at my Chat Box, asking for an update because I know I will fail again and again to attend for the request.(but that's not the reason why I deleted my Chat Box ya...)
Why I'm writing all of this??
All this moment, I'm afraid for pouring out my thoughts and feelings via blog posting. I rarely express my real emotion neither my condition. It seems to me, a gigantic invisible wall called SELF ESTEEM block me all the way through before I can embark to the beautifulness of 'FREEDOM TO WRITE' chamber.
I always respect those who could freely write whatever he/she feels to write; be it bitter or sweet, be it private or public, be it sensitive or provocative..(and the list goes on). I couldn't do that. I just could not.
The moment I try to write something that is private, especially if it's some kind of story or experience that is not so 'favourable', I will warn my self. "Not to make anyone ashame, do not let your readers thought of something bad that happened, do not try to gain symphatize from your writing, and so on and so fourth."
I wish to write a lot. Really. And I mean it. It's just that i could not do it. I don't want any people to get hurt with my writing or even make false assumption with my posting. And i could not take risk of exposing my emotions.
People say, written text does not necessary reflects the writer.
I agree.
Well
I don't know.
Should I write anymore?
-Penyu menangis siapa yang tahu-
Yours truthfully,
WS
Dear reader(s)- if any,
My fingers aren't cooperating that much nowadays when i try (or rather push) myself to write anything anywhere - well exception goes to those work loads from lovely office that need my fingers' attention and not to forget, my brain - to function as well.
Well, i guess, life has changed so much in many forms. Everything that was used to be normal are no longer 'ordinary'. Example? Hmm... Do i need to give one when i'm in fact writing in Uncle Sam's language?
Honestly, i feel pity to those who subscribe to my dusty blog as Followers. I feel ashamed to answer those similiar questions at YM, email, chat or other means of communication - "Bile nk updet blog?". I feel bad whenever i saw a message at my Chat Box, asking for an update because I know I will fail again and again to attend for the request.(but that's not the reason why I deleted my Chat Box ya...)
Why I'm writing all of this??
All this moment, I'm afraid for pouring out my thoughts and feelings via blog posting. I rarely express my real emotion neither my condition. It seems to me, a gigantic invisible wall called SELF ESTEEM block me all the way through before I can embark to the beautifulness of 'FREEDOM TO WRITE' chamber.
I always respect those who could freely write whatever he/she feels to write; be it bitter or sweet, be it private or public, be it sensitive or provocative..(and the list goes on). I couldn't do that. I just could not.
The moment I try to write something that is private, especially if it's some kind of story or experience that is not so 'favourable', I will warn my self. "Not to make anyone ashame, do not let your readers thought of something bad that happened, do not try to gain symphatize from your writing, and so on and so fourth."
I wish to write a lot. Really. And I mean it. It's just that i could not do it. I don't want any people to get hurt with my writing or even make false assumption with my posting. And i could not take risk of exposing my emotions.
People say, written text does not necessary reflects the writer.
I agree.
Well
I don't know.
Should I write anymore?
-Penyu menangis siapa yang tahu-
Yours truthfully,
WS
